


I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine

by imargarita



Series: Prompt Me [1]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Asscher cut diamonds, Ben works too hard, Breakups to Makeups, Engineer Rey, Established Relationship, F/M, I just wanted this out of my brain, Lawyer Ben Solo, MARRY ALREADY, One long ass chapter with multiple POVs, Reylo - Freeform, Reylo twitter prompts, Unbeta'd one shot, everyone swears and needs their mouth washed out with soap, varykino lake house
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-09-28
Packaged: 2020-10-29 20:48:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20802743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imargarita/pseuds/imargarita
Summary: A twitter prompt you say? I don't want a beta you say? Betas should be used for good. This exercise was purely to get it in writing and out of my brain so I can work on the other WIPs.Reylo_prompts tweeted out a few weeks ago:“After their breakup, Rey gets a call from a shop to inform her that her ring is resized. She realizes that Ben loved her enough to ask his mother, with whom he barely talks, for his grandmother's ring, and that letting him go is the biggest mistake of her life.”Thank you for indulging me.





	I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine

**Author's Note:**

> The one shots are getting me in the mood to write again (yay!).

_“OK, you can do this. I’ll see you in a week. Just do whatever Rose says, and make sure you clear the pickups every night.” _Those had been Kaydel’s last words to BeBe before she had rushed out of the office to make her flight.

BeBe has only been working for Tico Jewelry for a week, but she knew when she was hired that Kaydel was going to be leaving shortly for her babymoon. Kaydel had spent the week training BeBe in all her duties including calling people to tell them their jewelry was ready for pickup.

BeBe loves her job. She loves the necklaces, earrings, bracelets, every day ring; but what she wanted to do when she grew up was be just like Rose Tico, the owners’ youngest daughter who was in the in-house engagement and wedding rings designer. If part of paying her dues is calling people for an hour a day telling them their orders were ready, so be it.

Tico Jewelry is a busy company. The clientele had been small at first, mostly Asian immigrants like the Ticos, but as the community rose in prominence so did the store. Th founders’ son, Tran Tico, has a fancy business school degree from some elite school out east, but he returned home with something better – a new wife, Loan, who was also a talented jewelry designer. Under Tran and Loan one shop expanded to three; and the original store became the flagship, showcasing most of their original designs.

Pickup calls were made in the second floor of the flagship. Usually the space is filled with any number of Ticos or their support staff, but BeBe has lucked out today. Paige has the admin staff out on some sort of celebration for the last quarter results, Rose is working from home, and well Kaydel is on her babymoon.

BeBe makes herself comfy, opting out of her desk, and instead camping on the leather sofa in the lounge area. She slips off her shoes, props her feet on the coffee table, and uses the phone next to the couch. Trays of orders are stacked in front of her and she pulls at each tray, examining each piece and the work order before making the calls. She completes a call on a custom platinum bracelet and reaches for the next tray from the stack.

“Oh,” she whispers as she looks at the ring tightly nestled in the velvet. It is one of those take-your- breath-away rings. Jewelry could be bought for many reasons, but engagement rings? These are almost always life changing, this definitely is going to be.

She frees it from the velvet, twisting it left and right, and letting it catch all the light. It is an Asscher cut diamond accented on each side by smaller baguette and emerald cut diamonds. BeBe reviews the work order and almost drops the ring back onto it velvet cushion. The center ring is just a little over 4 carats, color rating F, and internally flawless. _Jesus fucking Christ, _this is a unicorn of a ring. The color is so close to clear it had to be worth close to a hundred grand, especially with a total of one carat in accent stones.

People lose their minds over rings like this. Whoever this – she glances at the name of the customer –Ben Solo is going to marry was one lucky bish, BeBe thinks… but then she looks at the description. _Resize. Looks like the lucky bish already said yes. _

She takes a few moments, gathering herself and then calls the mobile number on the contact list.

“Hello?” a man answers the phone with a clipped British accent. _Sexy. Of course, he was a sexy British. Probably a duke or something like that and this was probably an original Asscher from the early 1900s made for some duchess._

“Hello?” He repeats.

She clears her throat, they hired her because she had excellent customer service skills, and she is not going to be a blubbering fool over a ring and a customer who is already getting married. _Get a hold of yourself, Beebs! _“Hi, this is BeBe Choi from Tico Jewelers downtown. Is this Ben Solo? Your -”

“I’m sorry you have the wrong number. I just got this mobile.”

“Excuse me?”

“I. Just. Got. This. Mobile. Moved here from London last week. Went into a store and was assigned this number. You’re not the first person to call or text for Ben Solo. Lot of angry people looking for him.”

“Oh. I’m sorry. So sorry.”

“Not your fault, BeBe… but, if you happen to reach Mr. Solo, can you please tell him to call his mother?”

“Uh, yes. I can do that. Thanks again.”

_Well then. Strike one._

The next number is a business line. BeBe is connected to the central operator, where a woman answers, “Damask, Palpatine, and Snoke –” _worst name for a law firm ever “-_how may I direct your call?”

“Uh, hi. Can I get Ben Solo, please?”

There is a pause. “I’m sorry, ma’am -” _don’t ma’am me, I’m probably younger than you are, _“-just one moment, please.”

“Hello?” Another male with a British accent answers the phone. _What are the odds? _

“Mr. Solo?”

“As if _fucking_ if. No, this Armitage Hux. Ben Solo no longer works with this firm, but I’m taking over all his cases, and this is?”

“Um. I don’t have a case. Mr. Solo had something left at our store and I’m calling to tell -”

“Pound sand, little girl.” There is a slamming sound and BeBe looks at her own phone. _Bastard. _

_Strike two. _There was one more number. Home.

“Hello?” The voice is soft, muffled – _maybe she has a cold?_ –feminine. And British. The third time, BeBe thinks, must definitely be the charm. She is about to speak when the woman on the line keeps talking, “Rose? Rose, seriously? I’m OK. I promise.”

_Oh, this lucky bish knew Rose. So much easier this way_, BeBe thinks.

“Hi! Um, hi, this isn’t Rose. It’s BeBe. BeBe Choi from the shop?”

“BeBe? Kay’s new assistant? Hi. This is Rey. We haven’t met yet. Did Rose want something?” The caller sniffles.

There are strict protocols to calling home when one works in the engagement industry. Always ask for the person who ordered the ring unless -

_Resize. _And the name – _Rey – _is familiar. It clicks. She is Rose’s best friend. Finn’s sister or something.

“Actually, I’m not calling for Rose. I’m calling for Kay. Actually, for Ben? And you, I guess? Your ring? It’s done? Being resized? I’ve been trying to reach Ben, but -”

“I’M SORRY? WHAT?” BeBe knows the sound of women crying. Crying and screaming too, which this Rey is doing right now.

BeBe whispers, wondering how fast she can get a new job after Rose fires her, “Your ring? It’s done.”

“I want to speak with Rose. Right now.”

_Strike three. I’m out. _

***

“Tell me the story again,” Rose orders, three hours later. The shop is closed, and they are in the back room, Rose’s private lounge where she meets with her clients. Rose sits on the couch, with her sister Paige, and in the middle sits a very upset Rey Niima.

Rose and Paige are dressed impeccably: a black sheath for Paige, while Rose wears a heather gray sweater dress, both of their hair and makeup in place. As they are wont to do, both are wearing their mother’s designs: Paige with a matching earring and necklace set of opals – the month’s birthstone, while Rose wears gold dragons with ruby eyes at her ears and around her left wrist. The dragons are part of Loan Tico’s signature Sheng Xiao Collection, the year of the dragon the most coveted sign. The bracelet presses between Rose and Rey’s arms, as they clasped hands.

Rey, on the other hand, is the exact opposite of her stylish friends; a disaster. She is dressed in black yoga pants and a purple Coruscant University sweatshirt, different colored stains on both pieces of clothing. BeBe also notices the UGGs. UGGs that don’ t match, meaning Rey owns more than one pair of ugly boots. Her hair is uncombed, probably unwashed, and hangs limply past her shoulders. This is not the type of person that should be wearing an Asscher cut 4 carat diamond.

“BeBe, please. Tell us the story again.”

There is not much to tell. Again. “It was in the customer pickup trays. No special instruction from Kay before she left or on the work order. His cell didn’t work, some guy said he just got the number. And then when I called his work number some Arvid Hugs guy said he didn’t work there anymore… and then I called the home number. _I’m sorry.”_

“No, no, this is not your fault,” Paige soothes.

“No, it’s my _fucking _fault,” This from Rey, who is crying again. BeBe thinks she had a strong constitution, but really the way this girl cries, and how she looks completely devastated – and homeless to be honest – her heart breaks for the older girl.

And then it hits Bebe, “Oh my God. He’s alright, isn’t he? Your fiancé? He’s not in the hospital in a coma or something? He’s not – he’s alive right?” _Jesus Christ. _She needs to stop watching K-Dramas with Grams.

“He’s alive,” Rose answers but in such a way that BeBe can’t tell if Rose is glad of the fact.

Paige’s phone breaks the silence, as it vibrates on the coffee table and Kay’s profile pic pops up. Paige speaks into it, “Kay? Kay, yeah, thanks for returning my call. Sorry to bother you on vacation. We need help clearing something up. I’m gonna put you on speaker phone.”

“Hello everyone!” Kay sounds happy. “What up?”

“I got Rose, Rey, and BeBe with me.”

“Sounds like a party – oh. Rey? Oh, _Jesus fucking Christ.”_

***

_It had been a Friday afternoon and Kay was wiping down the ring cases when a quiet bell went off, announcing someone had entered the store. _

_“Welcome to Tico Jewelry. Hey, Ben!” She beamed as her husband’s best friend made his way to her counter. One of assistants started to move forward – they were supposed to offer refreshments within the first minute – but Kay waived her off, “A friend of mine, I’ll take care of it.”_

_She smiled and was about to offer him tea, but took a good look of him instead. Ben was a litigation attorney at one of the city’s best firms. Impeccably dressed in a tailored suit, Kay couldn’t help but think of how Ben Solo was walking sex on a brick house stick. _

_At seven months pregnant, Kay was horny all the time, and her hormones decimated her filter. Anyone even remotely attractive became the star of her porn filled daydreams. Yesterday, it had been the UPS guy. The same UPS guy she helped pick out a wedding ring for. Thankfully Poe was not flying for the next few days, because she needed the stupid fucked out of her. _

_Ben smirked as if he knew what was going through her mind._ Of course, he knew._ Poe had a stupid fat mouth. She begged, “Please, don’t say anything. At all. It’s embarrassing.”_

_“I said nothing,” he nodded. The smirk gone, and his face a neutral mask. His eyes twinkled, _God he was pretty… No wonder Rey –

_Thinking about Rey broke her out of her inappropriate reverie, and Kay cleared her throat, “Well your girl is not here. She just left with Rose and Paige. Wedding planning and all that.” _

_Rose was getting married in two months, and Rey had double duty as the Best Person and Second Maid of Honor. She was in the shop pretty often, her office only two blocks away._

_Ben swallowed and looked around nervously. “Yeah, that’s kind of why I’m here.” _

_“Sorry, Ben, you’re going to have to spell it out for me. My brain cells are fighting the good fight and keeping Poe’s DNA from dominating my baby.” _

_He smiled, and she knew she has never seen this smile on Ben Solo before, because Kay was 98% positive that if he had smiled like this when she met him, she would have made a move on him. Even if he had already been dating Rey at the time. _

_Ben dropped a small ring box – not one of Tico Jewelry’s – on the counter. He paused, for dramatic effect, before opening it and she felt like rolling her eyes. _

_Until she saw the ring. Then Kaydel started to bawl._ Jesus Christ, the hormones. _She grabbed at the discreet tissue box on the counter and took the ring out of its cushion. That was a bad idea, because a fresh set of tears rolled down her cheeks, tears Kay couldn’t stop. The ring deserved all the dramatic pauses. It was beyond beautiful, an Original Asscher with only 50 or so cuts – not the 74-facet cut of the new Royal Asscher. This was like holding a Guttenberg bible. _

_Rey was going to die. Rey was going to fucking die when Ben proposed. Two of her friends were about to take the plunge – they really should have been married years ago before everyone else – but if this was what was holding it up, Kay could see why._ A goddamn antique Asscher_… “Oh my God, Ben!”_

_“I did good?” He asked, and she made ready to slap at his arm – his delicious hard bicep – but then she caught the glitter behind his eyes. Even those unshed tears didn’t fucking compare to the shine of the Asscher diamond._ Rey’s diamond_, Kay decided to name it. _

_“If you don’t get a blowjob out of this, have Rey call me. Tell her she needs to do it for the entire female population.” _

_He laughed, and again she was surprised by how unfettered it was. Ben was aloof, even with people he had known for years, even with Rey who he has been with for almost 6 years. “We should record these little nuggets of wisdom you’re doling out.” _

_“Like a pre-baby book. Brilliant… do you want me to clean it? I can have it ready in a few minutes -”_

_He shook his head and pulled out another ring. It’s a hammered silver band set with a round lapis, an eight-pointed star overlaid on the stone, and then a small diamond at the center. _

_“This is Rose’s.” One of the few non-wedding designs that Rose did. “From last year?”_

_Ben nodded, “She put it into production right around the same time that Rey got her job… and this was Rose’s gift to Rey. It fits her right ring finger perfectly.” _

_It was Rose’s motto:_ the left hand is for love; the right hand is for celebrating.

_Kay put the two rings flush against each other. Ah, Rey’s hands were larger than whoever owned the Asscher originally. _

_“I’ll have it sent away today and rushed. I’ll take care of everything myself,” She told him. There’s only one person she trusted to do this; and she was going to pull in every favor to have this ring ready as soon as possible._

_“Thank you… and please, don’t tell Rose. I want it to be a surprise and the two of them don’t have any secrets between them.”_

_“Got it. And Ben,” she put her hand over his, “she’s going to be so happy.”_

_There’s a vulnerability to him as he looks at the ring, “I love her so much. So fucking much, Kay. She’s my fucking everything.”_

_“Stop it, before I cry again!” But she already was as Ben reached for another tissue. _

***

Rey is exhausted. It has been twelve days since her breakup with Ben, but she dreams of him every night. Of them together in a house by a lake, somewhere in the distance children laughing, but when she turns to catch them, she wakes, her hands instinctively searching the space next to her. She comes up only reaching air, because this bed is smaller than the one she shares – shared – with Ben.

At first, she had thought their life was going enough. She had been with Ben since she was a freshman in college, and he was her first in everything. Her first boyfriend, first lover, first person she didn’t think she could live without.

Then two things happen at once: her friends were all starting to start their lives by getting married or having children and then he was identified as a junior partner candidate. He was ecstatic. The money – _fuck the money –_ was incredible, and it was a step to becoming a full partner who would get profit sharing.

She is happy for her friends, but none of them has been with their partners for as long as she and Ben have been. Last month alone her mail and in box were full of constant updates: Kaydel’s baby shower, Phasma’s housewarming, Rose and Finn’s wedding invite, Jess’s surprise elopement announcement. _Rey hadn’t even remembered his name until she saw it on the announcement._

What she is not happy with is how Ben has been working himself to the bone. Cancelling dinners, outings with their friends, even a vacation. He lives and breathes the firm. They fight – more in the six months than in the almost six years – about how often he isn’t there. He ignores her pleas, begging him to quit, or at least to work less. All she wants is for them to be together.

But parts of her whisper that maybe she doesn’t even like this new Ben. He buys a new car, changes his work wear to custom made suits, and worst of all he gets rid of everything they had scrimped and saved for because it was used, and no longer fit the image he is trying to project.

Buying her clothes should have been the biggest clue really. She realizes it one day as she is alone after he cancels dinner, staring out of their new apartment at the city below them. If he doesn’t want her as she is now, in her garage sale and thrift store finds, then he is never going to want her. She doesn’t fit into his image.

She meets his co-workers, his assistant, the paralegals. They’re all beautiful women dressed to impress, they don’t eat the appetizer, and they only drink wine and hard alcohol. The assistants give Ben coy glances, blushing when Rey catches them. It’s the attorneys – the fucking sharks – that stare her dead in the eye as if to say _he’s going to tire of you soon, little girl. He belongs with us. _More often than not she is the first to look away.

She knows Ben wouldn’t cheat on her. He would be honorable about it, and break up with her first; and she lives in constant fear that he is going to dump her. Once she gets the engineering job with the construction company, she’s afraid that he will leave her since she can now stand on her own two feet.

Then twelve days ago, their anniversary.

_They had reservations at their favorite Italian restaurant. And the week before, he had seemed so nervous that she thought maybe this was it, maybe all of this frenzy the past few months was because he was ready to take the next step and propose. If it happened, she was ready to spend 75% of her time dressed up any way he wanted – ok, honestly 20% of the time. He never pushed her to wear anything he bought; she worked on construction sites for her job and the dresses were impractical… _

_Except nothing happened. Right before she was leaving to meet him at the restaurant, he called to cancel for some last minute all hands-on deck meeting at work – _

_She realized he wasn’t going to change. Not since he had been working the past 4 years for those awful people at Damask, Palpatine, and Snoke. She didn’t even know why he did it. The money was one thing, but he was unhappy with the work, he hated his coworkers, and Snoke, the only named partner still alive, was downright creepy in how he worshipped Ben’s long dead grandfather. _

_So when he came home in the early hours she was up, waiting with an overnight bag packed. She was done. She was so done. He had looked tired and exhausted, and for a moment all she wanted was to pull him into bed and hold him. She had to actively push the thought away. _

_“Rey?” He took her in, the bag, her tear streaked face. For a minute, the look he gave her had almost made her change her mind. _Fear.

_“I can’t do this anymore,” she whispered. “I can’t be with you.”_

_“What are you talking about, baby?” He had moved forward his hand out to touch her and she had flinched, taking a step away from him. _

_“It’s not working, Ben -”_

_Then his cellphone had rung and he had reached for it in his pockets, his fingers at the button as he glanced at the screen, “Wait. Let me get this, let me make this go away and we can talk. Rey, we need to talk -”_

_She loved him so much, she had nodded as he turned away to take the call._ They could still fix this.

_The call had lasted a few minutes and she had wanted to scream,_ how long does it take to fucking tell someone you would call them back?!

_Until she heard him end the call with, “I’ll be there in an hour.”_

_When he turned back to her, she didn’t wait for him to speak. “I’m going to stay at Finn’s for a few days. I’ll come back to get my things…” _

_She wasn’t surprised when he didn’t chase after her. He had a meeting to get to after all. _

***

Everything that happened twelve days ago doesn’t make sense with what she learned today. She wanted to reach into the phone and throttle Kay. This could have all been avoided if Kay had just told _someone._ She hadn’t even told Poe about Ben’s visit.

It was too much. She was numb as everything happened around her. Rose telling BeBe it wasn’t her fault; Paige closing down the office; BeBe apologizing. Rey thought she gave the younger the right words – not that she remembered any of it – because BeBe seemed calmer when she left.

Rey barely remembered getting into Rose’s car or getting into bed. For the first time since the breakup she has an uninterrupted sleep, and when she woke up this morning, she felt different.

_He wanted to marry me. _It changes everything.

She gets out of bed and heads towards the shower, letting the water run hot, and scrubs her skin raw, as if she is trying to create a whole new her. She grooms for the first time since the breakup and shaves everything. She washes her hair with both shampoo and conditioner, though some of the tangles can’t be undone easily. She put on real clothes and was glad it was Saturday. She has two more days before she has to return to work. Two more days to figure out how is was going to fix this.

Finding Ben is Step 1.

Actually Step 2. She texts Kay first, to see if Poe is up. Once she gets the green light, she makes the call.

“Hello, Rachel.”

Rey flinches. Only strangers call her Rachel. She hates the name and had it legally changed to _Rey_ after her emancipation. Ben had been a 2L that year, and working under his Uncle Luke, they helped her free herself from her Uncle Unkar. After signing the papers, Ben had offered her his hand, “_It’s nice to meet you, Rey Niima.” _It was the first time they had touched, her small hand in his larger one, and she had carried the warmth of him for a long time.

“Hello, Poe. I need to know where Ben is.”

“I think you’ve done enough, Rachel.” She can hear the self-righteousness in his voice, even though he speaks quietly.

“Be nice,” Rey hears Kaydel plead with her husband.

“I am being extremely nice,” Poe says into the phone and not at Kay.

“I know you don’t like me right now.” _I don’t like myself very much either. _

“Oh no. That would be the easy way out. I’m extremely disappointed in you, Rachel.” She bites back the wave of tears that threatens to spill over, but a few slip out as she blinks. Poe has her number all right.

“Tell me where he is.”

“Hell no.”

“I am trying to fix this.”

“What was broken? That you weren’t happy with him? And then what you see some shiny fucking ring, like Elizabeth Bennet saw Netherfield –”

“Pemberley. She saw Pemberley, you idiot, and of course I wasn’t happy with him! You weren’t either with him working 16 to 18-hour days -”

“But I didn’t leave him.”

“That’s not fair, Poe. You have Kaydel. You have a baby on the way. In a few short months you guys are going to have a family. I have none of those things. I didn’t think I was going to get any of those things. Please -” she is crying again. _Where were these tears coming from? Shouldn’t it be different today?_ But maybe the shower has somehow replenished the supply of tears. “You get to judge him from your high tower, but you don’t have to live with him. We can’t live together if he’s the same Ben… and I want to live with him, Poe.”

“Are you sure?” His voice is softer, kinder.

“He really left the firm?”

“That bridge has been burned with kerosene and there is no salvaging it… yeah, OK. He’s at his grandmother’s cottage.”

Of course, he is. She should have thought of that. Padme’s cottage at Lake Varykino.

“Thank you. Thank you so much, Poe.”

“Bring our boy home, Rey. And smack him on the head for me. I’ll smack you myself when I get back.”

***

It is a 2-hour drive to the Lake, even breaking the speed limit for most of it. The mountains are ten degrees cooler than the city, but Rey lowers the roof on the convertible and lets the wind do what it will.

Varykino is Ben’s favorite place in the world. In their six years together, a lot of their free time was spent at Padme’s cottage. Most of it had been happy times, except once, when unbeknownst to Ben, Leia and Luke were already at the cottage, also planning to spend the weekend. There was plenty of room, the cottage was just a cute nickname for the five-bedroom lodge.

_But while Ben and his father have some sort of understanding – they weren’t close, but they tolerate each other – Ben and Leia are definitely estranged. Ben and Luke a little less so, but there was still some awkwardness after Ben left Luke’s firm. _

_“You’re the girl I’ve heard so much about. From my brother of course, not Ben. Ben doesn’t speak to me after all.”_

_Leia Organa did not pull any punches. _

_“I’m Rey.”_

_And despite her loyalty to Ben, and to Han really - it was working for Han that led her to Ben – Rey liked Leia. _

_“Maybe she should have had a daughter,” Ben had whispered to her that night in bed. _

_Maybe she should have, because while Luke invited Ben for a walk after lunch, Leia had led Rey to Padme’s rooms. The two women bonded over Padme’s beautiful dresses, and the family albums that abruptly stopped around Ben’s 10th birthday, when Leia and Han divorced. But there was no denying Leia loved her men. No matter how much hurt existed between them. _

_Leia wanted to learn everything about Rey. A lot of the questions were about her childhood, her work with Han, school; but Leia moved the conversation where she wanted eventually: details of Rey’s life with Ben. Rey lived with Ben, knew a skilled litigator leading her down a path when she heard one… and Ben had definitely inherited his talent from the Skywalker side… Rey knew how to deflect, but she wanted to give Leia pieces of her son back, even if only from a distance._

_“I’m glad he’s happy,” Leia had said, as she put the albums away. When she returned to the bed, she had a small jewelry box with her. _

_“Let me give you something for making Ben happy,” Leia had opened the lid and the stones were mostly clear – diamonds of course – but there were other gems in all colors of the rainbow. _

_“Oh, no! I couldn’t!” Rey started to protest, putting her hands up._

_Except Leia was quicker, grabbed them gently, and dropped all sorts of jewelry in Rey’s palm. _

_She didn’t have pierced ears so she put those back into the jewelry box. She tried on a ring with a thick band, set with blue stones all around it, and the ring stuck above her knuckle. _

_“See, no good.” She flashed her hand at Leia._

_“Rings, my dear, can always get resized… Ben, and don’t tell him I told you this, used to love looking at my mother’s jewelry. He would sit on her lap when she was entertaining, and fidget with her engagement ring all the time. That was his favorite, and once you see it, you’ll understand why. That’s not here of course, that’s in my vault back home. But when Ben wants it, all he has to do is ask.”_

_Rey had blushed then. She and Ben never talked about marriage. She wasn’t even done with school yet, and he had just started the job at Damask, Palpatine, and Snoke. Maybe they would go on forever in this state of being unmarried. As long as she had Ben, she thought she would be OK with that. “That’s not in our current plans.”_

_Leia laughed, “You think he already hasn’t planned this out – I bet he knows the month and year. Only a fool would bet against you two living the happily ever after.”_

Now, driving up to Varykino, it all comes back. She remembered Ben and Luke returning from their walk, and laughing al little easier this time. Somewhere on that trail, they had called a truce, and Luke had even told Ben if he ever wanted his old job back it was waiting for him.

After the trip, there hadn’t been much improvement between Ben and Leia, Ben still tensed up when she called every six months or so to check up on him. But he at least answers them.

They must have talked for him to get the ring. Kay’s last words during the call come back to Rey, “This ring, Rey, it’s a treasure from the past. You don’t buy this ring, you gift it down to your kids, and their kids, and their kids’ kids. It’s beyond gorgeous, and if you don’t give Ben a blowjob after you say yes, I will personally hunt you down and kill you. And you better fucking swallow.”

Rey wiped the tears from her eyes as the cottage came into view. She was crying about blowjobs now. This was her life. _No, silly, _a voice whispers in her head as she gets out of the car, and heads down the pathway until the double red door entrance loom large_. No, silly, your life is beyond those doors._

***

The doorbell rings throughout the first floor of the cottage and Ben immediately regrets the upgrades he had done last year. It is probably one of his neighbors wanting to take a look inside Padme’s cottage. His grandmother was a famous socialite in her day, and her home is the largest on the lake; and the only house that isn’t occupied for a significant portion of the year.

He wants whoever is ringing it to go away. He wants to wallow in his high school levels of emo, and he needs to be left alone. After the doorbell chimes for the third time – _seriously I could be in the shower, asshole – _he stands and wrenches the door open, ready to tell the intruder to fuck off. In French if need be.

_Rey._ It was as if the wind is knocked out of him all at once. She is standing in front of him, beautiful and out of reach even though they are so close.

“Can I come in?” She asks, pushing forward, and he staggers back with each of her steps. He can’t be near her. it’s too much. Two weeks are not enough. Two lifetimes may never be enough.

“How… how did you find me?” Fuck, he sounds like a scared child. He doesn’t need anyone, least of all the woman who has broken his heart, to hear how pathetic he is.

“Poe.”

_Fuck. Traitor. _“Yeah, sure come in.”

The formal room in the front looks like a tornado has been through it. There are takeout containers everywhere, a blanket and pillows on the couch – so much easier than making it upstairs – and the TV is currently on mute. _Good fucking God, the Notebook was playing on the 65-inches. _Noah Calhoun was kissing Allie Hamilton in the rain.

He picks up the remote and turns the system off. “Can I get you anything?”

She shakes her head.

She looks none the worse for wear, dressed in tight black pants and a blue long-sleeved shirt. Nothing like he does. He looks at himself every day in the mirror and it doesn’t change. He has bags under his eyes, his hair is greasy as fuck, and he is on his way to owning a horrible beard. Oh, and he most definitely smells like ass.

“Can we please sit down?”

He moves the blanket and pillows to one side, and she takes her favorite spot, on the edge and pats the seat next to her, “Ben, please, can you sit down?”

He twists his mouth, and puts his hands in his pocket. Shaking his head, he leans against the wall. “What do you want, Rey?”

“Ben, please.” She puts her hand out to him.

It’s outstretched for long seconds, and his vision wavers as unshed tears blur the edge of his vision. _Fuck, _a tear escapes him. He shakes his head, and she drops her hand. He tries to look beyond her, outside of the floor to ceiling windows overlooking the lake.

“Just say what you needed to say, Rey,” it’s a whisper, when all he wants to do is make her leave so he can put his head on the cold marble floor… but then, then she’ll be gone and it will really be over. He needs to drag this out, maybe. If this is the last time they are alone together for the rest -

“I heard you quit your job.”

He nods, still looking out the window.

“Why – why didn’t you call me? After?”

“For what? So, you could say _good job, Ben_? No thanks.”

“Ben, it was making you miserable.”

“It was going to give us the life we needed, the life you deserved.”

She smiles at that, a small one, but a smile nonetheless, “I didn’t need the nice apartment, the nice clothes. I just wanted you.”

He doesn’t like the way this conversation is going. “Look, can you just – what do you want, Rey?”

“I wanted to give you something back.” She stands and he wants the ground to fucking swallow him whole, because in a minute she is reaching for his hand, and pulling something out of her small purse -

It’s his grandmother’s ring box, and he stares at it for a long time.

_Motherfucker._

She starts talking again, “They called me. They called your cell first –”

_And Kay and Poe were in Takodana for their stupid vacation. _Kay is now on his long shit list. Poe should divorce her. His laugh is empty, “It’s the firm’s. The cellphone belongs to the firm.” He hasn’t had his own cell in over four years. There was no point.

“Then they called the firm.” She doesn’t hide her distaste, even if she doesn’t call it by name.

His laugh is hollow, “I bet that went fucking well. So, then they called your cell.” He has always put her number down for home, he doesn’t even think about it. He shakes his head at his own stupidity, hitting it again the wall behind him. “Fuck.”

“That’s what I said too. What were you thinking? You were just going to propose? Without even getting a feel for what I was thinking? You don’t spring that you want to marry someone - it’s the 21st century. You’re supposed to bring it up gradually, make plans together, pick out rings so there are only small surprises. This, this is a huge decision!”

He’s so fucking done. He needs her leave before he embarrasses both of them. “Noted. Trust me the next time I ask someone to marry me I’ll make sure it’s a done deal. Fuck I’ll let her pick the goddamn ring.”

The box is suddenly heavy in his hands. This ring belonged to the most important person in his past, and he wanted to give it to the woman he thought was going to be his future. _Fuck. This. Shit. _

He throws it away, aiming for the couch, but it bounces off, disappearing underneath the coffee table. He immediately regrets it. Just because Rey doesn’t want anything to do with him doesn’t mean he should treat his grandmother’s property –

She’s wiping at her own tears with the back of her hand, and seriously she ugly cries with her whole face. It’s endearing, and he wants so much to drag her against him, hold her, let the fucking world end. “Why are you crying?”

“You don’t want to marry _me_?”

Maybe he’s dreaming, or dead. Because this is ridiculous. “No, Rey, you made it pretty clear _you_ don’t want to marry _me_.”

She takes his hands in hers, squeezes them. He doesn’t squeeze back and tries to let go. It’s a weak attempt, and she holds tight. He loves her so much, it’s instinct as he curls his hands around hers.

She put her forehead against their clenched hands and whispered into his closed grip, “I thought you were going to leave me.”

_Jesus fucking Christ. _“Why would I ever do that? You’re everything, you deserve every fucking thing. Your shit parents did a number on you.”

She looks at him with her large hazel eyes, moss green and honey, “And what did you do? You were working so much, putting everything else in front of our relationship. And then you missed our anniversary, and didn’t care that I was leaving… You let me go.”

“I never thought you would leave me. I thought it was just a fight, and then a few days later all your stuff was gone.”

She kisses his hands, a spark leaps from her lips to his knuckles, “There really wasn’t a lot left, Ben. You threw a lot of it away. You were getting rid of everything, part of me thought I was next.”

Twisting a lock of hair around his fingers, he tugs at it until her hand reaches for his, their fingers twining.

“That’s the exact opposite of the truth, baby. I wanted to give you everything, wanted to make sure everything was in place before I proposed. At first, I was hoping to make partner before asking you. But then I got the ring from my mom… and I realized I just wanted to be with you. I was planning on asking you as soon as the ring was ready… I never should have let you walk away.”

“You never should have told them you would be in an hour after you came home that morning.”

“I know,” he whispers. “You kept telling me and I didn’t listen and then it was too late.... Funny thing? I never made it to work that day. There was no way I wouldn’t have done something stupid, so I went in to work the next day, those fuckers didn’t give a fuck that -” he cups both her cheeks with his hands “-that I was still in shock. That I needed time. Snoke demanded that I get my head together and man up… he meant work of course. But it brought everything into focus. I _did _have to man up. So, I quit. Right there and then. Threw the phone at him and missed by a few inches, and then was escorted out of the building. Thirty minutes tops. That’s how long I was there.”

“It really shouldn’t have come to that, Ben,” she kisses into his palm.

“I’m a slow learner. But, fuck, baby, losing you. Not coming home to you. It was the fastest way to learn my lesson. You will always be first. I will always choose you.”

“That’s all I ever wanted, for you to choose me.”

“Baby, in every time line and in every universe I will choose you. I promise.”

He looks over her head. The ring was supposed to be proof of his promise.

She glances the same way he is, and moves his hands from her face. She squeezes him, and walks away, separating from him slowly, until only their fingertips touch. He feels the universe in her fingers, and the electricity echoes when she lets go.

She moves to the front of the couch, and goes on all fours to look under the coffee table. Grabbing it, she flashes the box at him, before getting into a sitting positing with one of the armchairs at her back. She smiles up at him, as if she has read his mind, “See, maybe if we talked about it, before you got this ring… I would have known that you want me, like I want you. Forever.”

_He should have asked years ago. What was he waiting for? _

He moves until he’s right in front of her, and then crouches down, balancing on the balls of his feet. He pries her fingers open, the box in her hands -

_“When you ask her, tell her everything. Never let a day go by without you telling her what she means to you,” his mother had said when she dropped the box in his hand. “My parents loved each other forever, and they told each other that every day… Your dad, didn’t like the words so much.”_

_“I know,” Ben said, with no ounce of sarcasm. _

_“We had other problems of course, and we’ve been divorced longer than we were married… but he was my forever too, Ben.” _

_He had kissed her on the cheek, the first time in a long time. And maybe it was having the ring in his possession, but he felt so light and free. “Mom, call him. Tell him too. Listen to your own advice.”_

_She laughed then. “Let’s get your girl locked down first. Then maybe…” _

***

He cups her jaw and Rey holds his gaze. His eyes are red, bloodshot like her own, but no longer wavering. She will never love anyone else like she loves Ben Solo. He’s messy, dirty, and now she has no doubts,_ he is hers._

“I’ll love you forever, Rey.” The box creaks as he opens it with one hand. He’s distracted by the ring for a moment. “She used to twirl this ring with her other hand, and I picked up the affectation, spinning it on her ring finger when she let me sit with her.

“I know this isn’t your style. But before you, my grandmother was the only one who really believed in me and that meant everything.” Then he turns the ring so she can see it - and her eyes widen. This is the first real look she’s gotten at it. Rose had opened and closed it quickly, and Rey only remembers the brightness of it, nothing else. Before Ben had opened the box, she probably wouldn’t have been able to pick it out of a lineup.

But that was then, and now. Now she knows she will never forget this ring. The light seems to dance in its multiple facets; and yes, it’s huge, but really why are there small rings again? She has never understood the phrase go big or go home until this very moment.

Ben has lived his entire life forging his own path. He doesn’t dwell on the past except, Rey realizes, for things that were important to Padme Amidala Skywalker. He holds those as his most treasured objects, and he has shared them with her their entire relationship. He brought her to Padme’s cottage the first month they started dating. And now this ring… she can picture a younger Ben twirling it on Padme’s fingers, secure in his grandmother’s love.

She looks up at Ben to see his eyes are on her. “It’s so beautiful, I can’t even imagine how much it’s worth –”

“If my grandmother had worn a ring out of a cracker jack box that would have been the ring I would have given you… and I know you so well,” this time he places a kiss on her temple, “that I know that you would cherish a toy ring as much as you cherish this ring right now.”

She’s crying, but this time there is a lightness in her heart. She nods, and laughs through her tears.

“I wanted to give you this because I want you by my side. Forever. You mean everything to me. And I’m so fucking sorry you didn’t know how much you mean to me, I’m sorry I chose work all those times before, but if you give me a chance, Rey –” his voice breaks on her name “– I promise I will never make those mistakes again. I’ll make different ones, unfortunately, but I promise I won’t make these ones again.”

She wipes his tears with her fingers.

“Please,” he holds out his right hand, empty. “Will you marry me?”

She sobs – she _hates _ugly crying – and nods vigorously. Placing her left hand in his right, she throws herself at him as soon as the ring is on her. Arms around his neck, she buries her face his shoulders, and breathes him in deep. He smells earthy, too many days without showering, but she can’t get enough of him.

He swings on his feet for a moment, and then falls back sitting, positioning her so that she is on his lap, his arms never leaving her. They stay, wrapped around each other, his lips against her temple until she’s stopped crying.

“I love you,” she whispers against his neck. Lifting her head, she kisses the tear that falls from the corner of his eye, snuggling closer as his arm tightens around her. She waits for the heartbeats under her ear to slow down then she lifts her left hand to take a good look at the ring.

It’s warm against her temple when he speaks, “I love you too. So much. And you don’t have to wear the ring every day. I know it’s a little much and we can get a simpler band.”

She’s shaking her head, “I’m wearing it every day unless I’m on a construction site. No one has ever given me anything this gorgeous and meaningful... but you know....”

She looks up and he looks down at her with a raised eyebrow.

“Kay was right, this is a fucking blowjob ring if there ever was one.”

He laughs loudly, and tightens his grip on her. “Shower first… I smell.”

She wrinkles her nose, “Yeah, you do… Let me help you.”

She starts to get up and then thinks better of it, instead kneeling in front of him. She rubs her nose against his, enjoying being in his arms again. Their lips meet and it starts with soft kisses, the twelve days the longest they have gone without each other in six years.

The kiss deepens, and he bites at her bottom lips before sliding his tongue into her mouth. Ben can kiss for hours given half the chance, but she wants more.

She pulls away reluctantly, “Shower remember.”

He groans, but gets up. Without missing a beat, he crooks his arm under her knees and carries her up the stairs.

***

There’s no finesse as they strip in the large master shower. She helps him peel his shirt off, her hands quickly skimming at his abs and then her fingers find the top of his sweatpants, pushing them down. He steps out of them, and is reaching for her shirt, just as quickly unbuttoning the front until he can slip them off her shoulders. He turns on the shower, setting the temperature to a little on the scalding side, just the way she likes it When he turns back, she has stripped herself of her pants, and she is completely bare to him. He places a kiss to her temple, and then he is leading her inside, letting her under the shower first.

He has kissed every part of her, fucked her in every way possible; but right now all he wants to do is look at her. _Is that a new freckle at the dimple of her ass? _He thumbs at it, making a mental note to kiss every new freckle he finds. 

“I can hear you thinking,” she laughs as she pours body wash onto a loofah and hands it to him. He is thorough, pulling her back against his chest as he reaches around and starts at her neck, then tracing the lines of her collarbone. He pays special attention to her breasts, pinching both of them in turn and he feels her shiver against him. When he reaches between her legs, he dips a finger into her – _she’s already wet for him_ – and drops a kiss to her neck. He turns her around and his hard cock announces how much he wants her at her stomach. He cleans her back, slowly tracing her spine, and then his hands are squeezing her ass, pushing her closer to him.

They switch and he stands under the hot stream while she soaps him up. Her touch is a little harder, but once he is clean, she reaches for the shampoo. He makes it easier for her and kneels, burying his head on her chest. He could stay like this forever, having her fingers card through his hair, his hand at her lower back. He stands, dropping kisses at her heart, her neck, and lingering at her mouth before he starts to rinse.

When there are no more suds, her hands find his waist, and she holds his gaze as she drops to her knees. He makes to pull her up, but she shakes her head as she trails kisses along his shaft. He groans when she takes him into her hot mouth.

He is hitting the back of her throat, there’s still a few inches that don’t fit, and he should have known, _should have known_, how fucking beautiful it was going to be when her left-hand wraps around him, and diamonds wink at him from her fingers. He almost comes, just looking at his ring on her. _Mine, she’s mine. _

Just as he is hers. Padme’s favorite verse from the Old Testament comes to mind, one she had incorporated into her vows with Anakin, and one Ben knows he will repeat in front of all their family and friends when it's their turn –

_I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine._

**Author's Note:**

> I kept tweaking it, and I could tweak it for a much longer time, but I really need to go work on some other fics. 
> 
> One of the best part of finishing this is that I finally get to read TourmalineGreen’s [start with the ending (get it out of the way)](http://archiveofourown.org/works/20706461). I subscribe to the author and sooo wanted to read this when it came out.
> 
> A short list of links:  
[The ring ](https://eragem.com/rr60178.html?utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=bing_shopping&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=shopping)  
[The history of the Asscher](https://www.brilliance.com/diamonds/what-is-an-asscher-cut-diamond)  
[Who was Damask?](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Darth_Plagueis/Legends)  
[What inspired the second ring, designed by Rose](http://www.thejewelleryeditor.com/media/images_thumbnails/filer_public_thumbnails/old/56884/Dior-Rose-des-Vents-bracelet.jpg--760x0-q80-crop-scale-subsampling-2-upscale-false.jpg)
> 
> Head cannon 1: Kaydel totally high fives Rey when she gets back from Takodana; Poe slaps her on the back of her head, but Rey slaps him right back. Head cannon 2: Ben and Rey invite BeBe to the wedding because otherwise who knows how long they would have taken to get back together? 
> 
> Be kind, be supportive, and chat back at me on twitter @imargarita11.


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